A Shot of Adversity

Growth comes out of the cauldron of adversity.

We can not develop resilience, ‘mental toughness’ nor can we refine grit without the uncomfortable immersion in adversity. Sometimes we can choose the challenge. Sometimes the challenge chooses us.

When I worked for Outward Bound we created and some times manipulated the adversity and….some times it found us. Choosing to climb a mountain, rafting a river, backpacking for 23-days with complete strangers - those are choices we made. The weather, rock-fall, unexpected changes by land managers, a lame horse that couldn’t deliver our resupply on time - those were not in our control necessarily (albeit our reactions to those events - were definitely under our control!).

While the experiences could in of themselves provide us with the opportunity, the key was having and taking a moment to reflect on the experience in order to better facilitate a ‘transference’ to every day life. We might ask at the end of the day - how did we let our values and team mission guide us?

2020 has been with no exception for adversity - it is a challenge that chose us, and unfortunately the chaos seems unrelenting and unending.

Yet. There is an opportunity here.

While the experience has been draining, stress inducing, and exhausting… we can choose to grow.

We have a choice - we can let the experience control us - getting fused with our thoughts, reacting to them by drinking, drugs, or raging - or even avoidance altogether. Checking out.

Or we can choose another direction - accepting of the thoughts and emotions that come with it as part of the human experience - sadness, angst, depression, frustration, anger, fatigue, (because these are normal…) and move in the direction in which your values guide you - experiencing discomfort in the service of your values- who you want to be as a person…

Try this - maybe daily, a couple times a week, or even at the end of the month - Find some time to reflect in a journal on this experience (or another adversity).

Ask your self these things -

How did I handle myself in the face of this adversity?

What could I do differently in the service of my values?

What went well and was in the service of my values?

What would I change in the service of my values?

Much like what a vaccine does for us - by stimulating our immune system to become more resilient in the face of a specific threat. So does that challenge that presents itself to us now. It is a shot of adversity, whether we chose it or not…now build and capitalize on it.